Emergency news bulletin

there is a gang of evil little kittens  they are much more dangerous than they look trust me I have the scars to prove it they are very violent and taking over the streets of the world if you see any of these kittens call:

1-800 evil kitty(this number is not linked to evil kitty inc©in any way) 

help will arrive in 24-48 hours- or eventually

if you are lucky but your call is very important to us we need your help

THANK YOU 

Football: $20. Flags: $18. Outrunning your opponent in flag football while giggling like a girl: priceless.

i'll give you 5 bucks to lick these

He tests everything before he buys it, so just be glad we're not in the toilet paper aisle.

sup all people florida is neat but its too hot even the pool is like bath water

Where will you be when your diarrhea returns?

"Luke, I am your father....and Jango is your mother... and these Storm Troopers are your second cousins twice removed."